Insert sarcasm here:

Ya, that's right. Put that in your pipe and smoke it...

Apparently, we've been doing it all wrong.

Did you know that it's the act of relaxing that makes a baby? And being less stressed that makes a baby?

Ya! Apparently! All of us so-called 'infertiles' have just been making shit up.

And did you know that as soon as we apply for adoption, we'll all get pregnant? Ya! I know!

I am up, WAY too early on a Saturday morning because I couldn't sleep. Why? Because yet again, yesterday another person told me that I'd never get pregnant being as stressed as I am - that I need to relax, and go with the flow! That's what they did, and it worked the first month all 4 times.

My immediate reply (albeit, defensively) was that I'm not stressed - why? do I look stressed? I don't feel stressed.

Then I thought about it a bit as she continued to ramble on in her fertile way about whether I've tried this and have you tried that.

And really and truly - it took everything in my being not to punch her teeth in.

I'm not stressed. I don't need to relax. I need you fertile fuckers to get up outta my grill! URGH!

I REALLY wanted to say something like, hmm. This:

"You know what? I'd be SUPER stressed if I were you! You have 2 kids in college, one with a drug addiction, the other on academic probation, then 2 more still in highschool (and well, that speaks for itself!) AND a husband whom you think is or may be cheating on you! I think you should think about de-stressing. Here! I'll give you the number of this fab spa I frequent - it's totally worth the money.
Oh - and another thing! :)
Keep your fucking opinions and suggestions to yourself."